Even the strongest relationships go through their ups and downs but it is the power of the bond between the partners and commitment to each other that steers them clear in these troubled times.
While a relationship is only as strong as the two persons involved in it, the connection does not sour overnight. There will be telltale signs that things are breaking down and something needs to be done to stay afloat.
Love is obviously important, but it is not the defining factor. Instead what is more important is the health of the relationship or the lack of it. The key here is to communicate your issues with your partner openly.
That said if you notice that things are still going astray, but at the same time are determined to make your relationship work, here are seven ways that will save your relationship from falling apart.
Seek professional help
Couples have found counseling as an asset even when they are not in a failed relationship. This is because couples counseling can overcome almost any issue that is putting strain on a relationship and make it thrive long-term, provided both the partners have made the decision to attend the counseling session TOGETHER. You don’t have to be married to seek couples therapy, in fact couples at any stage of their relationship can consider counseling.
A registered couples counselor can help identify the gaps within the rift and equip the couple, and any children involved, with the right tools to solve the problem, once outside of counseling. There is also recourse to couple therapy retreats, which are fun and beneficial when it comes to strengthening or healing a relationship. If you don’t have time for a long retreat, or can’t afford a therapist, check this site out.
Communicate with each other
Poor communication is the root cause of many broken relationships. Sharing ideas or feelings is a very important aspect of a sound relationship, and one which couples normally sweep under the rug instead of talking it out whenever there is a disagreement. Keeping quiet on these important things will lead to an endless blame game in the mind.
This may allow you to cool off for a day or two, but the problem is bound to come up again if you are unable to understand each other’s expectations. Additionally, if you cannot communicate in the house without raising your voice, find a public spot like a park, library or restaurant where you can discuss things without embarrassing those around you. Clearing doubts about the issue and what caused the fracture is the first step towards bridging the gap.
Learn to compromise
If your relationship is heading nowhere, an effective way to end a disagreement is by compromise. If you can’t learn to do this then the situation will never get resolved. Giving in to your partner may take some time and doing, but is deeply important for healing and repair. Remember, all relationships require a give and take, especially if you are living in close quarters and can accommodate each other’s needs and preferences, without having to sacrifice your own can help in fostering fulfillment and happiness.
You can also consider working on an arrangement that allows both of you to unwind at home on your own. Also while one partner stays out late on Monday and Wednesday, the other too can hang out alone or with friends on, say, Thursday and Saturday. Forgiving past mistakes, too, can help a relationship start afresh.
Plan an extended sex date
While good connected sex can offer a breakthrough in your relationship, it doesn’t have to be penetrative intercourse. In fact, sex should be considered as another form of collective ability to communicate with each other in your desire to work through an emotional roadblock. Holding hands or hugging also is a sign of connection that boosts the release of oxytocin, a hormone that is known to elevate mood and reduce stress
So put off the phones, hire a babysitter for the kids to get all the distractions out of the way and mark the calendar for a really spoiling sex session. Even if the experience is not deeply fulfilling, the communication between the two of you will certainly be at its best.
Focus on wellbeing
Relationship struggles, whether big or small, can easily throw one off balance and make it seem that the partners are not able to cope with each other. This is why it is important to look after yourself by doing something to improve your daily life.
Self-care can create a huge impact by increasing your ability to cope with stress to help better the conflicts in a relationship. Some options to consider are spending time in nature, using a journal to express yourself or set small goals and see them through..
Speak to someone about it
Loneliness is an enemy, especially if the feeling is a result of a broken relationship. So if you are feeling alone and lost in a relationship, talk about it with someone you trust. Describe the relationship to the person in a way that will help understand your problems with your partner. For example, if parents haven’t approved of the choice of your partner, it will be tough to explain to them about the relationship issues. You can try talking to a close friend for help about your relationship to ease some of the burden from your shoulders.
Be honest with finance
Money issues can crop up even when the wedding vows are being exchanged. The cause could be courtship costs to high wedding expenses, and when couples have money there could be serious conversations about finances. Be honest about your current financial situation so that one partner can be saver if the other is a spender. Don’t hide on debt and allow each person to save and spend at their discretion in an independent manner. A top healthy relationship tip is to talk about caring for each other’s parents as they grow old and how to set aside money for them in case needed.