Planning a wedding can be an intoxicating and stressful activity for both. Details, decisions, and projects can take up all the free moments of the month, but always remember that your commitment is not only to plan the wedding day but also to prepare you for a life in marriage. Of course, the things you want to discuss vary depending on how well you know each other and especially the openness you have for certain topics because they are delicate and in many cases change the lives of both.
We at Livetray always hope for the best of life, health, and relationships so here are the most important things you should discuss before getting married to have a great lifelong relationship with your partner.
An excellent technique to start on this topic is: sit down together and write a budget for your first month of marriage. If you both work, how much do you have and how do you plan to distribute it, always plan what percentage you can spend and how much you should save. To do this you must analyze your priorities, tastes, and needs. You should also talk about your projects in the long, medium, and short term, and do purposes and actions that lead you to fulfill them.
2. The balance between personal life and working life.
What are your plans and expectations? It’s always a good idea to put work and home on the scale and try to give a balanced quality time to both. If you both work from 9 to 5 you can be seen to eat together. It’s only fair that you both prioritize your time together, your time with friends, your time alone. It’s all about talking and realizing what the other person has in mind.
3. The future.
Even if it sounds clichéd, you have to ask yourself “where do I see myself in a year, in five, in 15? How many children do I want to have, do I want to have children, what are my ambitions, what will we do if there is a job offer involving either of us to move? What if someone else decides not to work? And most of all, how does my partner feel about it?
4. Sexual life
This issue is very important because even if it looks like your granny is telling you, things change after marriage. It is simple, with marriage come more responsibilities, and with them, more pressures and less time for intimacy. But it should not always be so, so it is essential that you speak openly and sincerely. Here the most important thing is not to let the flame of passion extinguish, and for this, you must know your tastes, your fantasies, your desires, your stories, the things you want to try, the things you do not want to try, the things you have tried and want to do again and also the ones you do not. Because you’d better know and get to work and lament for the rest of your lives.
5. Therapies and counsellings
Every relationship has its high points but also its low points. When the latter arrives, you should be prepared, you should discuss how you feel about therapies with professionals on the subject, and why not, create your own. You have married for a reason because you care for each other and have sworn to love each other to death, so you can create your own codes to know how to bear a low point in your relationship. The important thing is not to let anger or discord take hold of you, for your home and children are the main ones affected.
6. The house chores
This simple point may seem simple but could be the cause of many conflicts, especially in the early years. Talking about the roles of everyone can be a very effective and secure tool. You should come together calmly, talk about the activities of the house and be open, tolerant and try to support each other, you must decide who will do what and when, and most importantly you must stick to the agreements you have. Many times one must sacrifice a little, but in the end, discipline in marriage is always well rewarded.
You should know the things that one does and that the other does not seem very hygienic, and reach agreements to change them and reach an intermediate point where you are both happy. Weight gain is also something that very often happens, you should be open and honest with the way the other person feels about this. Do you have diseases? You should share and discuss your clinical picture and have an action plan to prevent risks. Do you like sports, can you practice it together?
How do you plan family travel? How attached will your partner’s family be in their relationship with your own family? You should be comfortable with this topic, and for this, you must set some rules, such as visiting times, calls, other types of communication. Many times your partner thinks of one thing about your family that you don’t yet know, for this you must always be honest and respectful.
9. Social life.
What are your priorities? Friendships after marriage can wear down a little and must support each other so that this doesn’t happen. Your partner may also have friends who don’t like you so much, how do you plan to wear that? How do you feel if your partner goes out with their friends from time to time? Talking about it in advance can avoid hundreds of embarrassing moments that can go very wrong. You should also discuss how you can cultivate your relationship, i.e. your outings together or as a family, moments of fun, etc.
What did you think? Did we miss one? We honestly believe that the main thing is always to have good communication, don’t you think? Although you’ve probably been told to be tired, talking and having agreements is the key to success in marriage. We’re sure you’ll do a good job after you get married, at Livetray we worry about you having a happy marriage.