Guys On Dating Sites—Why Is Online Dating So Hard For Men?

Difficulties related to the search for a soulmate arise for almost all people at a certain stage of life. Specialists link such problems with the personal qualities of young people, the peculiarities of choice, and the requirements for a potential soulmate. To facilitate the process of finding a girl, you must first determine why it is so difficult to find a girl. So, let’s find out why is online dating so hard for men.

What is online dating like for a man?


Online dating is a way to meet potential partners through the Internet. Online dating can take place on specialized sites or applications, in social networks, in chat rooms, or in forums. Why is online dating so hard? Online dating has its own advantages and disadvantages, as well as its own characteristics for men and women.


Online dating has a number of advantages for men, such as:

  • A greater choice of potential partners. Online dating allows men to meet women from different countries, cities, ages, professions, and interests. Men can choose those women they like by appearance, character, or lifestyle.
  • Greater accessibility and convenience. Online dating allows men to meet women anytime and anywhere. Men don’t need special skills or courage to approach women in real life. They can communicate with women through text messages, audio or video calls.
  • Greater anonymity and security. Online dating allows men to control their personal information and avoid unwanted contact. Men can use pseudonyms, and hide their photos or data. They can also stop communicating with a woman if she is not a good fit or makes them uncomfortable.


However, online dating also has a number of disadvantages for men. Let’s break down why is dating so hard for guys.

  • High competition and low returns. Men dating online are subject to the law of large numbers. They must compete with other men for women’s attention. Men must send more messages to get a response from women. Moreover, men must be patient and persistent to translate online dating into a real date.
  • Great uncertainty and deception. Online dating does not guarantee that the man a woman contacts matches his profile or photos. The man may hide or embellish his details, interests, or intentions. He may be unavailable, busy, or not interested in a real relationship. He may be a scammer who wants money or personal information from a woman.

Is online dating worth it for men?

Psychologists say that men’s attitudes toward online dating depend on several factors:

  1. Goals and expectations. Men may have different goals and expectations for online dating. Some guys on dating sites are looking for serious and long-term relationships with women. Other men are looking for short-term and superficial relationships with women. Still, other men are looking for fun and experimentation with women. Men’s goals and expectations influence how they choose, communicate, and interact with women in the online environment.
  2. Self-esteem and self-presentation. Men may have different self-esteem and self-presentation in online dating. Some men have high self-esteem and self-confidence. They present themselves realistically and positively. They are not afraid of rejection or criticism. Furthermore, they find it easy to connect with women. Other men have low self-esteem and insecurity. They present themselves unrealistically or negatively. They fear rejection or criticism. Likewise, they have difficulty finding common ground with women.
  3. Attachment style and emotional state. Men can have different attachment styles and emotional states in online dating. Some men have a secure attachment style and a good emotional state. They are able to establish trusting and harmonious relationships with women. They feel comfortable and happy in online dating. Other men have an unstable attachment style and a poor emotional state. They are able to establish conflicting and dysfunctional relationships with women. They feel tense and unsatisfied with online dating.

Why is dating so hard for men?


Psychologists also argue that men’s attitudes toward online dating affect their relationships with women. In particular, it can affect the:

  • The quality and duration of online relationships. Studies show that men who have high self-esteem, a secure attachment style, and serious intentions tend to have better and longer online relationships with women. They are more understanding, supportive, and trusting of their partners. They also make the transition from online contact to an actual date more easily.
  • Levels of satisfaction and happiness in real relationships. Research also shows that men who have high self-esteem, a secure attachment style, and serious intentions tend to have more satisfied and happy real-life relationships with women. They adapt better to real life and retain interest and passion for their partners. They also resolve relationship problems and conflicts more easily.
  • The possibility of cheating or breaking up in a real relationship. Research also shows that men who have low self-esteem, an unstable attachment style, or superficial intentions tend to have a higher risk of cheating or breaking up in real relationships with women. They easily lose interest or trust in their partners. They are also easily seduced or pressured by other women in an online environment.

Online dating advice for guys: How to find a good woman online?


Online dating has long ceased to be considered something out of the ordinary. More and more people prefer this method to traditional first meetings offline. Does online dating work for guys? Psychologists recommend evaluating your partner soberly and remembering those opposites rarely find common ground. In fact, in love, everything is the opposite. Subconsciously, everyone wants to receive confirmation of the correctness of their views on life and worldview. If your potential partner has the same age, social status, culture, political orientation, and life values, there is every chance for a serious relationship.

Decide what you want

Be clear about what you want to get out of dating. More often than not, people are looking to:

  • Expand their circle of acquaintances, make new friends;
  • Create collaborations with people and groups who have similar interests;
  • Flirt and get into an intimate relationship with no strings attached;
  • Start a family.

Examine the profile and make sure the person you’re talking to is looking for the same thing. A girl may be looking for intellectual companionship, while a guy needs a new sexual partner. If your interests differ, don’t try to fit in with the person you’re talking to in the hope of changing things in the future. If you go to a mail order brides site, you can find a great partner there for a serious relationship. By the way, if you are still wondering: “Do mail order marriages still exist?”, We hasten to assure you that yes! This is a very popular type of marriage today.

Fill out your profile

Why is dating so hard? It’s not a problem to meet girls on the street, especially if you use the recommendations of psychologists and communicators. How to meet girls on the Internet? Fill out your profile on social networks or your profile on a men dating site with maximum details and truthfulness. Don’t be ashamed to be recognized, put up only your own photos. Keep your photos with minimal retouching and editing. Include more information about yourself. Your hobbies, pet intolerance, or favorite foods can help attract the right person. Don’t put big quotes or flowery poems on your profile. Be yourself and speak your mind.  To avoid disappointment after online dating, look carefully at your potential mate’s profile. Don’t fall in love with a profile picture. Evaluate the content and information on the profile. Look closely at what movies and books the user shares, what they’re proud of, what life values they convey, and what marital status they indicate. Assess the literacy of a potential partner.

Get to know the person as you communicate

Filling out profiles on dating sites or social networking profiles, people are not prone to self-criticism. They easily write the phrases “I am an optimist in life,” “I am goal-oriented and have achieved everything myself,” and “I am not lacking in a sense of humor.” Such self-descriptions do not always correspond to reality but rather demonstrate a person’s perception of himself, so they should not be blindly trusted. You can learn about the personality of the interlocutor and the peculiarities of his character in the course of communication.

Look for common interests


One of the catalysts to get closer to the interlocutor will be common hobbies and topics of conversation. Before you strike up a conversation with the person, analyze the information you have on your page, carefully review the photos, and look for something you have in common. That way, you can get a basic picture of the person and see if there’s something to talk about. This will make dating easier for guys.

Prepare a list of relevant topics

Why is it so hard to find a good man? In order not to be disappointed, it is important in the first stages of dating to understand if the person is interesting and to maintain a mutual interest. Ask questions, listen, and analyze the answers to show your interest in the conversation and learn more about the person you’re talking to. Ask about the events of the week, plans for the next weekend, and career ambitions. In response, share your own thoughts on the subject, memories, or, for example, funny cases from your childhood.

Don’t take rejection personally

Take it easy with dating on the World Wide Web. Even if you’ve met someone and it doesn’t work out, or if he or she suddenly drops out of the conversation, don’t take it personally. Don’t blame yourself for the failure and don’t take the rejection personally. Move on.

Stay safe

When dating, be polite, open, and friendly; this will help you find the girl you like. At the same time, you need to be careful. Experiencing pressure, attacks, disrespectful attitudes, or an attempt to beg money from the interlocutor during dating should immediately stop the dialogue. If attempts to resume communication on the part of the interlocutor continue, you need to immediately contact support services.  People easily open up to a virtual interlocutor on the Internet, which contributes to rapprochement and the emergence of feelings. However, you should not idealize your potential partner and blindly trust his profile on social networks. Try to get to know the person better, study all the available information, and assess the ease of communication, sense of humor, and similarity of life priorities. This will help you avoid disappointment and unnecessary stress, and even find love. Online dating for men is not only a way to meet potential partners, but also a way to get to know yourself and others. Online dating has its advantages and disadvantages, as well as its peculiarities for men and women.